Part of my problem is that I have never been good at enforcing boundaries in any of my relationships. I am trying to get better at recognizing when he has crossed the line and telling him I won't accept it anymore. The patterns we have fallen into -- there are both good and bad ones -- are a two way street. Before my attempt, I just had not idea how much they were effecting my mental health. I am making little changes and hope to make more but sometimes I backslide into my old ways. H on the other hand is hypersensitive about am I exhibiting behaviors like I did the day I attempted and sometimes that makes him want to control me more as in "Are you sure you don't need to take a pill (Xanax)"