Thank you very, very much for both reading and replying (and continuing to so.) I share the perspective that is typed in your post as well. As I noted in previous posts, there is much more content to the history with me and her, especially about money post breakup where she told me to rent an apartment for her in order for her to possibly "regain trust" with me, even though I was with no money at that point and told her so repeatedly. The aforesaid tidbit is just one example.

Additionally, much obliged for that chart on "grief." A friend of mine attempted to recall it simply from memory, but he failed to recall it well. I appreciate the breakdown and for you to show it to me.

It is startling to me and such a reminder of how subjective relationships (and life) are to me. To elaborate, I have been grieving and much more for this past month, yet she seemingly has been so well and fine. Moreover, she has been living her life (well and fine without me.) While I cried my eyes out, she was out and about living the (social) life of a college grad student in the UK. There seemed to be no grieving, remorse, lamenting, wishing or anything on her part about us for us. I seem to not even be an afterthought for her.

I have been how I have been this past month because I loved her, wanted to be with her, cared about both past and present and so on. Conversely, there was nothing for her because she felt nothing, did not care and so on. Thus, she continued living her life as if nothing were to have happened. Is she not engaging in self-deception (e.g. self-denial) and so forth about the past, how the past unfolded and more?

Again, not to play the victim, it seems so extremely horrible that someone (she) would do what she did and how she did what she did to someone else (me) throughout our relationship, post break up and even now during the month of no communication. I have felt like I died and have been dying, but she is living most lively and without any responsibility, guilt, consciousness of her behavior, the effects of her behavior and so on. Where is the empathy? There is none.