I have a good therapist and I've talked through all this with her. This is where we come to the bipolar part. A good therapy session isn't going to change the fact that I have bipolar and I feel my feelings more intensely. My therapist would tell me to let go of the past, that I can only expect hurt from my parents, that I'm not a little child anymore, to look at all I've done with my life. None of that helps. It doesn't help the frustration and the rage I feel.

My mother makes fun of everything about me from my subsidized housing to my prior disability, and yet I can not avenge myself against her and I have never been able to. I always found myself explaining to her that things weren't what she thought and I notice that even today with certain females I take the same stance.

I can not stand being misjudged and misunderstood, that's perhaps my biggest button of all.