I feel forking awful, but stably so. Some of this is I'm possibly fighting the flu, which I know messes with everything and the rest is that I'm fighting my image of myself vs my true self. I do think we each have a moral compass and I'm sure mine is broken. I'm not going to argue about what good I do or don't do, because that seems like it would be stroking my ego or stoking my fires and that's not important here either. What I am doing is trying to figure out if my compass is repairable and if I should try to. Karma would put me fruit bat in the Antarctic a few million years. Yikes that sounds rough, but truthful.
I'm not in a spiral, down or up. I'm thinking. I know I'm changeable because we're all in constant change, but should I do it? Likely, yes.
Then the big question becomes, "to what?"