I read this whole thread. I had the misfortune of having a similar relationship.
You just can't get believe or acknowledge the fact that you were used.
You definitely overthink everything. You seem to just be using the one side of your brain that is emotionally analyzing a practical situation.
You are articulating every little thing but are blind to reality.
Been there , done that. No matter how many people tell you the same thing over and over you will still try and find a reason to validate a one way relationship. RUN ! Work on your self esteem. Don't ever hand over your life
to anybody ! Love is a mirage. You just don't have enough experience to understand that yet. Take off the blinders and see life for what it really is.
I don't mean to be harsh , just realistic. Time to grow up emotionally.
Good luck to you. I mean that.