Many abusers are like this. They are able to convince anyone that they are perfect and can do no wrong. They tend to be charming, too charming!!

Many people that I hid the abuse from that my kids and I endured were shocked when the truth finally came out. Others wondered why my kids cowered at sudden movements or when I jumped at the sound of his voice. But oh, he is so wonderful, so charming......how lucky we were to have him. PUKE!! sorry but all so true.

I had others convinced that I was so clumpsy, the bruises that I could not hide were my fault. And gee, not sure why my kids act the way they do. But my doctor, what a wonderful man, knew exactally what was going on. He finally called me on it oneday. I tried to look at him and lie. But I broke down into tears. I took off my sunglasses that I was wearing in the fall for the black eye to come "shinning" through. I admitted that I could no longer take it. I was immediately admitted into the hospital as I had also admitted to taking large amounts of tylenol daily in hopes that my liver would shut down.

Others can only fool people for so long. Eventually the truth comes out. It could be an explosive display from the abuser who just can't contain themselves in front of someone, or it is the victim who has had enough. When my ex started to explode in front of others, not caring who saw his violent nature--I knew then that if we did not leave, he would kill us.

McDonald, I know how hard this is but nobody deserves this harmful behavior from anyone. This is not romance, this is control. He wants control. Please get out before you can't anymore. Let yourself begin the process of healing and someday, there is someone out there for you who will love you and respect you the way a partner should. Please keep talking, many here can relate and try to help you through this.

Be safe and keep us informed. I am worried for you my dear.

Lots of love,

Justy