Oh, yes, I tried to bring it up. Again and again. In doing so, I'd call down the wrath of the entire extended family for "being so negative" and "choosing to take it that way." How would I like it if nobody cared about me? Funny how it's always got to be one extreme or the other. Complain about being smothered, and I would only be ignored altogether. There is no happy medium.

Strangers don't always understand either. So many people have played the mother card on her behalf. "Oh, she's just being a mother. Worrying is what they do best." I've gotten a lot of "I wish my mother were still here to call me a girl and rearrange my house." Did their mothers, when they were alive, actually do those things? Usually not.

And again, why is all the worry focused on me and not my siblings? She doesn't seem to question whether my brothers can make the right choices for themselves, and I never saw her inspecting my sister's outfit when she got ready to go somewhere.