Thank you so much for all of your replys, thoughts and time! I can't express how much comfort I found here. I feel so accepted.

I am sorry for taking so long to reply. I tried to give your opinions and suggestions some thought.
Many expressed that there was nothing to feel sorry about and that there is nothing wrong about my past. I wish it was true. Unfortunately, I do not think so. People may have different oppinions on weither it is a new partner's business or not to know about one's dating past... but it remains a fact that I did not get tested on STDs on time and that I did not discuss the matter in a mature way.
My boyfriend is a person who is always thinking about long term consequences. (Another bad fight we had was because I used to smoke and he will question how it would make him feel if I get cancer because of this later in life...) This is why he blaming me for my past. Because I did not. And I that I regret about my past whows that he is right.

@ Anonymous87914Guest:
Our sex life differs a lot. Sometimes it can even bring us closer. Other times it will tear us apart because he will compare himself to my prior partners and conclude that I do not find him hot enough... and that again puts a lot of pressure on me. Still... sex is probably one reason why he is notbreaking up with me.

@ divine1966:
In what way a man who calls me “slut” is “the one” for me?
I never felt this alife with anyone. As a matter of fact this is the first time it ever came to my midn to call somene "love of my life". He inspires me and make me grow. I found back to interests that I lost long time ago because of him.
And I love that he is such a romantic. He will always put the relationsip first. He wants a high quality relationship. Sharing hobbies, having deep conversations, spending as mcuh time together as possible. That is what i am looking for, too.
Although this is far from how either of us would decribe the reality of our relationship. But this is why I don't want to give up. Because I want to have that with him.

@ Curry:
Thank you! What your saying about taking responsibility for one's feelings realy cought me. I am sorry that you had to experience that people so close to you were blaming you for how they felt. That is what my boyfriend is doing, too, I think.

@ tecomsin:
Not all of this are my attempts of mind reading. E.g. the explanation of the list is his own. Actually, it is more the other way arround in my opinion and reminds me of what Curry wrote. Often I feel that he is the one who is expecting me to read his mind. (If I would put it this way to him he would probably reply that I should know how certain things will make him feel... if I was thinking about the relationship first and not being as selfish as I am...)

I am still willing to continue this relationship. I know there a lot of things I want to improve about myself. And somehow I think what he is missing is me committing truely and showing it. Putting us first. Discussing and planing everything with him. So that is what I will try to attempt. And I am seeing my therapist tomorrow.