I think MC definitely adapted to me, and current T is beginning to adapt to me. I have perhaps tried to mold T a bit in giving him feedback, telling what I do and don't want from him at certain times. But really, it's his choice in whether to take that feedback vs. just saying, "Well, this is how I am, take me or leave me." His willingness to take feedback and adapt--really, any T's willingness to adapt--is a big part for me in whether I can work with them.

I feel like, in T's treating their clients equally, it's more of an "each according to their needs" kinda thing (yeah, I know that's from socialism, but it seems to fit). For example, many clients probably wouldn't feel the need to have any outside contact with their T. So if a T isn't making outside contact with them, while e-mailing with other clients, that doesn't mean he or she isn't treating all clients equally. Or, say, for my T offering me some extra sessions--I'm sure he'd offer the same to other clients if they asked or seemed in need of them. But I pay the same rate for extra sessions, so it's not like he's doing that for me as a favor. (And even in the case of T's offering a sliding-scale, they're having clients pay what they can, which I see as equal in a way.)

OK, not sure how much sense I'm making. I don't think clients can "mold" their T's unless their T's are willing to be molded. And I think in that case, it's more of an adapting to each individual client, which is what they should ideally be doing anyway (with the exception of, say, a T who strictly provides just 8-week CBT or something like that). I don't think it's not being "real" or that it's an act--I mean, I'm probably somewhat different to everyone in my life, even between different friends, but that doesn't mean I'm not being "real" or putting on an act. Just adapting.