I compare therapy to parenting a lot, which is influenced in large part by my therapist's philosophy/orientation and also by my understanding of what I didn't get in childhood but should have. My sense is that a good-enough parent adapts to the child. They observe who their child actually is, where their child struggles and where they don't, and offer them the things they need to grow, whether it is extra love and affection, more structure, challenges to work through, ways to get certain skills, or whatever. Just like how siblings can be so incredibly different, each client has their own unique strengths and weaknesses that they bring to therapy. So the therapist is going to adapt, offering certain things from their own experience or different sides of their personality depending on what the client needs to have in order to grow. I don't think that's fake at all. I think it's incredibly caring.

Boundaries and limits are what keep the T from losing themselves in this. If they just gave you whatever you wanted and as much of it as you wanted, they would likely feel unhappy and depleted. I don't think they could be themselves in the relationship. So if your T strikes a balance between meeting your needs and keeping herself happy and safe within the relationship, then I think you have found a good therapeutic situation.