My boyfriend is in the hospital for about the 4rth time since Christmas. Could be the 5th . . . I'm losing track. When he's home, he requires a great deal of help with just about everything. (Ex: Can't shower or shave himself.) He has pneumonia and has gotten so weak he can barely stand. My big worry is that I won't be able to nanage his care at home. I think we need to get a hospital bed set up at home, which he's not really in favor of.

There is a home attendant who comes by three days a week to help me. She is about 50 years old and quite petite. I'm worried that he is going to be too hard for her to manage, if he can't even stand up very well.

I've successfully managed his care at home for the past 5 years. Without me, he would have been in a nursing home 5 years ago. I very much want to continue caring for him at home. At this point, it will be way more challenging than it has been. I am feeling overwhelmed.

The VA seems to be pushing me toward placing him in a nursing home, rather than helping me solve the logistical problems of successfully caring for him at home. I am saddened by this.

I hate feeling like the team at the hospital and I are becoming adversaries.