Do you have transportation?

I haven't gone to one myself because I have access to therapy but if I ever lose my benefits (I only get VA benefits when my income is low, I have disability until April), I am planning on attending a NAMI Support group. They also offer some Peer to Peer and Family to Family classes for free. NAMI is an organization that supports and advocates for people who are mentally ill.

https://www.nami.org/Local-NAMI/Prog...e-ad0868acd481

When I told my husband some of my paranoid thoughts it really hurt his feelings. He was so disappointed that after our long marriage that, "I didn't really know him; that I did not know that he is a good person." Only after telling him what I was really imagining about him did I realize how ridiculous some of the thoughts were. We can let our imaginations carry us away if we don't talk about it. PC is a good place to talk about things. Though sometimes it has reinforced my paranoid thoughts but that has been OK because I can look back at those posts and see how I get. If you jounal or post here--you start seeing patterns in your behavior. It has helped me see when I am getting more mentally ill. Sometimes sharing with our spouses does make them worry but when they know that we are being effected by a mental illness, it does help explain some of our behaviors.

Have you been diagnosed with a mental illness?

It sounds like you are struggling financially which is very stressful. I think stress can "activate" our mental illness issues.

You can make friends here. Keep posting and you may make some connections that make you feel less isolated.

Though I have a part time job, I also have relied on my husband for support. I encourage you to look for/try some jobs. It may take time to find something but it feels good to make your own money.