Today is day 5 and we are having a snowstorm and I'm feeling a lot of guilt about failing my son. For some reason I've had diarrhea with cramps since day 2 of my quit. This is not normal for me so maybe there's a connection. On the other hand it could be anxiety about my son's situation. Anyway MJ is not going to solve my problems. It's just a kind of temporary escape but I can't run away from life. Sometimes I wish I could start my life all over again. I have tons of regrets and am quite alone and also feeling lonely.