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Originally Posted by starrysky
I think that making friends as an adult is hard. It seems like everyone's paired up with another friends (or SO) and lately, I don't know. I'm looking for people I resonate with. Lately, I'm discouraged, because I am either meeting people who are weird and I don't want as friends, or my current friends / acquaintances don't even bother with me and I feel like **** about it. I have a lot of acquaintances and distant friends. A lot of them...don't seem interested in me unless I'm out and about doing stuff in the community with them as a group. I do wonder if it has to do with the fact that I identify as having MI and they know that I'm on disability. I suppose, in a sense, at least I know I can go somewhere and be with friends. Like meditation group.  I don't have a problem with this, per se. But I am quite jealous of people who have had good friends all their lives and are loyal to each other, etc. I want that! I want someone to watch tv with. And talk on the phone to. I want someone who I *know* is there for me when I'm in trouble and dealing with ****. I don't have that. At least, not right now. I do have social anxiety. It's not crippling, but I also avoid social stuff sometimes because of it. Also, I like being solitary sometimes. I'm an introvert. But I know I need to nudge myself more.
I'd really like some advice on how to make solid friendships as an adult. Maybe a discussion on this will help others as well!  |
I know the feeling! Most of my "friends" are either acquiantances or people I just text with but maybe only see on birthdays...it's definitely hard. My suggestion is, if you're on social media, maybe try and strike up a conversation with mutual friends who have similar interests as you. It's worked for me, and I made some great friends that I met up with from online.
Of course, if you do meet up with someone online, make sure it's in a public place.
Other than that, you could always try and socialize with people from work or school, or somewhere that you go regularly. Coffee shops are good places for that sort of thing too.
As someone who also has social anxiety, sometimes it can be too hard to approach someone, so maybe wear a shirt or an accessory of something that you're interested in. That's a good way to get people to approach you that might have the same interest.
For example, I wore a "Stranger Things" hat to one of my college classes, and this girl complimented me and now we talk everyday and we're starting to become friends!
I hope this was helpful, let us know if you make any new friends!
