Quote:
Originally Posted by NativeSky
Yes, for some reason I do feel a weight and responsibility to "fix it". But for this rupture I'm trying to let go of that and just step back and have him take the lead because I'm exhausted. The pressure of it is too much. I feel like I'm working too hard if there is such a thing in therapy.
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I also was in a therapy situation where i felt the need to fix ruptures. I bought the idea that working thru manufactured problems in a weird, anomalous quasi-relationship would make me less unhappy. It only created a new set of problems.
What are you meant to learn from a relationship where you are encouraged to disregard the feelings/needs of the other, and where the other pretends they have no feelings/needs, until the point where they become too hurt to hide it? It's a formula for dysfunction.
I'm with Missbella... it needn't be seen as a moral obligation. That is marketing, not reality.
I understand it can be hard to get out of these things, but I found it helpful at the time to at least recognize the futility of it.