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Do take your own time jacq10. Obviously, there's something here that's very painful for you. Touching that or bringing it out, is comparable to exposing a raw nerve. It can really REALLY hurt and we often do need to pull back from it a bit.

This can be a good time to allow yourself to practice self-mercy and self-compassion. No matter the circumstances, it can hurt terribly to lose the people we love. Part of healing is allowing ourselves to feel the pain of that loss, but if it's a really big loss, we often can only deal with it one small piece at a time. This is why when we need to pull back, we should.