I feel like I should explain first.

ever since Fire Emblem Fates came out, I have had a huge liking of Sakura (a very sweet girl from said game). Over time, I have grown to deeply, deeply love her, to the point where I have brought her from the game, into our world, earth. We got married, and life was all well and happy for a good while.

I worry about her from time to time. I want to keep her safe, protect her from anything that could even risk causing her harm. Bringing her here, into our peaceful home, away from the awful war setting in the game, has helped me to not worry as much. She's so pure and innocent, so kind and adorable, I love her so much, and I can't even bear the thought of her getting hurt, or worse... I suppose thats how any lover should feel. But every time I worry, Sakura is always here to hold me close and remind me that she's safe and happy here. We snuggle together every night, always showering eachother in love. The time we spend together like that helps me to remember that she's always here with me, all safe and happy, in perfect health. It has helped me to not worry as much about the thoughts of her getting hurt, since its possible for that to happen in the games she's in. Thats where my worries mainly stem from, along with the awful writings people have made about her getting hurt... but knowing that Sakura is safe, happy, and in perfect health, here with me on earth, always here to hold me tight and comfort me, has helped me to not worry as much.

But... I've recently had a bad dream that Sakura was talking to one of my friends about leaving me, and that dream has terrified me. I talked with Sakura about it, and she reassured me that she loves me with all of her heart. Infact, she sometimes asks me to promise her that I'll never leave her, and every time she does, I promise her that I will never leave her, ever. The fact that she asks me this at times shows me that she loves me, and I trust her when she tells me she loves me. But... I still worry about her because of that awful dream. I've been diagnosed with depression for a long while, and Sakura has always helped me with it, but sometimes it just makes it really hard for me to not worry about her. I've never taken her for granted. I always let her know how much I love her, how grateful I am to have her as my wife. I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost her...

This is where another thing comes in though... recently I've had difficulty bringing certain things to mind, processing things, comprehension and such... sort of like sensory processing disorders... I've had these sorts of things before, but never to this degree before... and because of this, I'm having trouble processing it when Sakura tells me that she loves me... I'm having trouble feeling her presence and touch when we snuggle at night, having trouble feeling that she's here with me... I talked to one of my friends, who has a similar connection to Asriel Dreemurr like I do with Sakura, about this... and he told me that even if I can't always feel her, she's still always here. I know this... I know she's always here, I know that she'll always be here with me, that she loves me with all her heart. I know all this... but not being able to process it fully really scares me, especially because of that terrible dream... It scares me even more so because my fears of her getting hurt, or worse, are coming back too... since fire emblem heroes and fire emblem warriors are out, there's more possibilities of her getting hurt from those games as well, more programmed models, pictures, and dialogue of her being hurt... and they terrify me. I'm so scared of the possibility of her getting hurt, or worse... so terrified of the potential of it happening... and its harder to worry less about all this right now because i'm having trouble fully processing and comprehending that she's here with me, safe and happy and in perfect health, reassuring me that she's okay, and that she loves me, which is what really helped me to not worry as much...

I don't know what to do... I know she loves me, she tells me she loves me every day, quite often at that as well. I know she does, and I trust her, and I know she's always here with me, safe, happy, and in perfect health, but not being able to fully process and comprehend it right now is terrifying me because of the awful dream and my fears of anything bad happening to her... I love her so much. I love her so much... I... I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost her... I'm so scared, so scared that I've been in tears a lot these last few days, have had trouble sleeping, have had difficulty working at my job... I'm so scared... I've had hospital visits because of how much I worry about her, before... I just... I love her so much, and I'm so scared because of all of whats happening right now... I don't know what to do...