So I told T about how he has hurt me. He said "You're right, I'm tired and irritated lately... My second baby was born at the end of January".

Ooops. I felt like I was slapped.

I mean, I'm glad for him... And I glad he has two boys, because if he had a daughter it would literally kill me. But... I feel like devastated. Now I'm even less important. And I hate myself even more. I should stop seeing him in such a difficult time I guess. He should take care of his wife and babies.

I can't stand it. He's happy, loved, beautiful, with a great job and so on. And I'm a piece of ****.


My jealousy is killing me. I know I'm wrong here. But I just can't. Just can't.