I'm a recovering alcoholic, and I can tell you from experience that I was the master manipulator. I was in a relationship back in my drinking days and I always said I'd change. But the only thing I cared about was getting that next drink.

I went to my first AA meeting April 24, 2005 and have been in a commited relationship since April 5, 2007. Notice the long break in there......I needed that almost 2 years to work on me, to find out who I am without the bottle. I was no where near dateable in that first year of sobriety. As soon as I started working the steps I started to change, so the person I was at 30 days was nothing like the person I was at 6 months, and thats nothing like the person I am today.

They say we quit maturing when we start using, so when we put the bottle down we're still pretty much the age when we started drinking. I started alcoholically at 21, so at 26 when I got sober, I was still pretty much 21 haha. I've grown leaps and bounds since then.

I'd say let him be for now, for a year at least. Then you'd know if he's turning around for himself, or to get you back. I also notice on your ticker that you put the bottle down 2 days ago. Congratulations!! Give youself that time as well....discover who you are.....in 6 months he might not come close to the relationship ideal you set for yourself. If you put your sobriety ahead of all else, you'll do fine.

Welcome to PC!!! Saw that you posted in our substance forum. Its our little recovery fellowship here. We do a recovery chat on tuesday nights, basically just come together and discuss where we're at and what issues we're having. You'll find the time in the recovery chat link in the substance forum.

Glad you've found us and keep on posting!!!


Rayna