Hello vel: I'm sorry you are in the midst of this difficult situation. From what you wrote, it sounds like your husband may be suffering from serious depression. Here are links to a bunch of articles, from PsychCentral's archives, on the subjects of depression in men, & how to help someone who is struggling with depression:

https://psychcentral.com/lib/helping...mber-get-help/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/10-thi...le-depression/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/tms/2...-is-different/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/careg...le-depression/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/welln...ession-in-men/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/9-ways...th-depression/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/9-best...th-depression/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/11-way...one-in-denial/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/how-to-...sed-loved-one/

Two forums, here on PC, that may be of interest would be the relationships forum, & the partners & caregivers forum. Here are links:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/rela...communication/

https://forums.psychcentral.com/part...ivers-support/

I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I don't know, of course, if you're here simply seeking advice with regard to this particular concern or if you plan to continue posting. However, should you be planning to continue on (we hope you do)... may I suggest you introduce yourself over on PC's New Member Introductions forum? Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/new-...introductions/

I wish you both well...