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Mar 12, 2018, 11:24 AM
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Member Since: Jul 2015
Location: Auburn
Posts: 38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Breadfish
How are you with eye contact?
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My Dad used to really make a point of telling his kids to do certain things, like "Look people in the eye when you're talking with them!" or, "Use a strong grip when shaking hands... it's a sign of a weak man to have a limp handshake." (That last 1 even for his girls.) (Which I am 1 of, btw  ) I always wanted to please him, even though it was so difficult, like most of you have written. I did develop a firm handshake without a problem, & to this day it really bothers me when the other person's hand feels like a wet fish! But I would have to make myself do the "look people in the eye" thing no matter how creepy it felt, & it certainly did feel creepy. To me, it was like I was staring at their eyes, & like they were staring back. If it was somebody I was comfortable with, I simply didn't notice whether I was meeting their gaze or not. Otherwise, I not only noticed, I was almost in pain trying to "be polite". It felt like the exact opposite of polite, to me.
However, like TheStrange wrote, I heard somebody say it was a good idea to look at an area close to the eyes if it made you uncomfortable to look directly at someone's eyes, & I began trying to look at their eyebrows or at the bridge of their nose, & by golly, it really works. For me, anyway. It no longer bothers me simply b/c I no longer have to do it. And, BTW, I don't think we're the only ones who feel uncomfortable with the matter, b/c I've read or heard that it bothers a lot of people.
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daynrand
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