Quote:
Originally Posted by DoroMona
I apologize for upsetting you. I post on the forums in an attempt to reciprocate for the responses I receive when I myself post. I wrote my honest impression after reading what you posted, but I'm new to the forums and perhaps it's more important to just give a supportive answer. You shared that you and he both made mistakes, hence my saying you both made mistakes, although my wording could have been better. I didn't actually write that the next guy deserves better, which would have been a much more judgmental comment. I wrote that I hope the next guy deserves better, i.e. that you find a nicer person for your next relationship. Anyway, it's clear I'm not being helpful in this thread, so I can only apologize and wish you the best of luck.
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I'm sorry. I understand you were trying to help. It has been kind of a rough/triggering day; I was at the doc earlier today to get tested and I hadn't fully realized how upsetting it would be to have to explain to her why I wanted to be tested for STIs. She is awesome, and was very empathetic and even called him an a-hole at one point
. But it's embarrassing to have to go through this when I'm not the one who made the reckless decisions. I was sleeping with someone I thought cared for and was faithful to me. It was even worse going to the lab and having my HIV, HPV, and HSV labs drawn. I mean, the phlebotomist doesn't know me, but I work for this hospital organization. That, and I'm a nurse; I know that, even when you aren't judging someone you're kinda judging them and sizing them up while ordering that HIV test. Wondering why. It's human nature.
I was matter-of-fact and even chipper when talking to my doctor and phlebotomist, but when I got home I broke down crying. It's just not fair. I've always been so careful when it comes to my health, sex, everything. I
hate him for putting me through this. Why do I have to deal with the consequences of his poor decisions??? He's a 46 year old adult for god's sake. He was always yapping about how I had to face the consequences of my actions, and always making sure I did... who is going to make him face the consequences of his??? God, I'm so mad, sad, just... I don't know today.
On a lighter note, the pregnancy test was negative. I mean, I wasn't too worried since I took that precaution upon myself. But can you even imagine.
