@Tisha: (((Tisha))) Thank you for sharing this with me. Regardless of what your diagnosis is, or isn't, you are right. It takes two to tango. It very well could be that this is not a good match for you, regardless if you have BPD, or not. Even though it is hard (that makes sense!) I personally think you are doing a healthy thing by at least separating. You're spending time away from him and it sounds like you're just doing what's best for you. You've had such indecision and unhappiness with him. I hope you don't feel badly about...like if you do have BPD...I would hope you wouldn't attribute that to your marriage ending, if it does end. Because just because anyone has BPD....I think that should not be all on them, also for my experience with BPD, I have found that 1.) my feelings are completely valid!!! They're just over the top sometimes. I know that some people with BPD have black and white thinking about others. I don't really experience this much so I feel like I can't comment. Anyway, I wish you the best and I think you're doing a healthy thing even though it is scary. It takes two to tango!!! And we're here for you when you need.

@SadGirl: Seeing what you said made me smile and quite happy. Thank you. I love that you are pro DBT. I am planning on joining a group coming up this summer. Yeah, I think that finding someone who loves you for you / me for me, someone accepting, and committed, is key.

@Graystreet: Thanks for your response! I have talked to my T quite a lot about diagnosis stuff. But not at all about being in a relationship while having BPD or BPD traits. She is going on maternity leave very soon. I'll be seeing someone else for 3 months while she's gone (I'm ok with that, met the person, etc, she seems nice). I think you're right, it's a good thing to bring up in therapy!