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Originally Posted by ruh roh
I don't really understand why therapists think it's so important to get angry. I had one who pushed it to such an extent that my internal rage grew and grew and grew and couldn't be contained, and I was just left as this angry alone person. From everything you've shared, I don't think your therapist is that incompetent, but I just don't see the value in getting angry like that. I think what you are doing, by providing a way out, is great and good.
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I think the theory is that depression might sometimes be "anger turned inward." So someone did something bad to you, and the "normal" emotion would be anger toward whoever did the bad thing. But for whatever reason you can't express that anger to that person...like maybe it wouldn't be safe to do so. So instead you turn it around toward you because that emotion has to go somewhere.
I think they are trying to get you to put that emotion where it belongs, toward the abuser. But if the abuser isn't around or it still isn't safe to express that anger toward them, it can stir up a whole bunch of emotions that you *still* don't know what to do with. I think if a therapist does pull up a bunch of that crap, they better be ready and willing to deal with it.