I quit working with my job coach. They said I could come back anytime. So that's good. But I didn't feel like I was getting help. I never wanted to be there and felt so unmotivated with her. Is it possible that she was NOT the right fit for me? Or maybe I'm meant to do the job search on my own. She didn't help me with a cover letter, said I'm intelligent enough to do that on my own. It was weird. I am intelligent. But I still don't have a cover letter, lol.

I applied to two jobs today and yesterday. One is a peer specialist job and the other is a sales associate at a pet store.

One thing I will take away with me from the job coach's organization, is that her supervisor told me, in a conversation I had with him about working and anxiety about it, is that many people who are on disability and have not worked in a long time, are afraid to work. I'm not alone. And take it one day at a time. I really really appreciated him saying this to me. I wish I coulda worked with him, lol.

I found a bunch of links that were helpful to me and wanted to share one:
The benefits of working

I had this realization in January, when I was was at a meditation workshop. It was the best thing ever (the workshop), and during my time there, an epiphany HIT me like a bolt of lightening: I don't think highly of myself, and I could. I think of myself as mentally ill. The mentally ill family member, friend, person on disability because of it. But what if I didn't think of myself this way? What if I saw myself as a professional? My name is Starrysky and I'm a professional. That was it, and to me it was such an amazing thought that it stuck. I remembered it. But that's really just the beginning. What if I not only thought of myself as a professional, but acted like one, everyday, too.

Thanks for reading if you got this far.