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Originally Posted by prefabsprout
This makes sense. Do you have any suggestions of how to reconnect with my younger self and heal?
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Great question... Have you ever found yourself digging through some storage boxes in your residence, and you discover something you had long since forgotten about, and then your reaction is along the lines of, "Wow I didn't know I still had this"....
Well that's quite analogous to what we're discussing here, regarding unresolved 'emotional baggage'... It's like a person is still holding onto something that he/she didn't know she still possessed... The key is to uncover it... You see it's quite natural and instinctual for individuals to push away and bury painful emotions and thoughts that are too challenging to cope with at the time in their life that they surfaced. This is
more likely to happen when we are young, inexperienced, and our degree of awareness is much less-developed... So the painful/challenging emotions can be pushed away and placed in 'storage' - only to need to be dealt with later in life (when the individual is ready/prepared to do so).
As far as your question - I can't precisely specify how to accomplish that for yourself. Your instincts/intuition will help steer and guide you to what you need to do and experience to accomplish this endeavor. Certainly writing exercises and allowing yourself to process (write down) your thoughts and emotions surrounding your childhood and those bullying experiences would be a good option and a cathartic tool to really allow yourself to reconnect with those sensitive emotions from your past. Also, perhaps there may be some childhood possessions or photos which will influence you to consciously reconnect with your 'younger self' - and this may aid in conjuring up emotions that are linked to that time in your life experience. Perhaps there was an individual that was responsible for a lot of the strong emotions that you experienced - and there may be a need for you to navigate your way to a state of forgiveness for that individual and what he/she had caused you to experience?
It's also really important for me to mention that there are times when life's current circumstances will unexpectedly 'trigger you' - and suddenly all of this sensitive emotional energy from your past gets conjured up and starts rising to the surface (of your consciousness). When this happens, it's quite challenging and uncomfortable - but it's actually a blessing in disguise. All of that stored emotional material/energy gets stimulated and starts 'coming up' so that you can consciously process it and finally purge (release) it... It just needs to be experienced on its way out. This happened to me - in my late 20's I experienced a set of external circumstances which evoked feelings of 'rejection' within me - and this unexpectedly triggered all of the emotional energy surrounding feelings of rejection that I had experienced throughout my childhood/adolescence. So the current external circumstances were not that bad or threatening - but they served as a 'trigger' for all of this sensitive emotional material/energy to rise to the surface so that I could release it and heal/purify myself. That's exactly what happened. My theory is that this will happen when the individual is finally ready to handle and complete the healing process - which is transformational once it plays out. So please don't beat yourself up if you can't (in your mind) figure out how you are going to fully heal yourself. I wanted to convey here that sometimes the Universe is actively coordinating & arranging things to help facilitate this process. That sometimes you are not actively 'planning' to experience anything - yet something very important and beneficial plays out.
So overall, I think you can absolutely foster and nurture the healing process - but there are also times where you find yourself experiencing unexpected and unanticipated developments that are also contributing and pushing you towards that goal/endeavor. Be proactive, but also remind yourself that things will play out in their proper place and time (when you are ready)...