Writeup of MC session Monday (to be followed by T session today in separate post).

Sat down, MC asked how we were. I told H to go. He filled him in on the diagnosis of his shoulder injury, talked about getting physical therapy, possibly ultimately surgery. Talked about how he probably couldn't do certain tasks around house, like gathering/taking out trash, for a while. I said how I could do them. MC said, "You'll get through it. I know it might be difficult, but you'll get through it." H and I kind of looked at each other like, "Yeah, we know!" Like we weren't looking for reassurance for that...just filling him in on what's going on.

I asked who his picks were for March Madness (college basketball playoff bracket), since his advice had helped me win 2 years ago. He said he hadn't picked yet. Had brief conversation about that.

Talked a bit about some stuff with D, but nothing too major. We were over halfway through session. MC said we could keep talking about D, or was there other stuff we wanted to talk about? I said I kind of wanted to talk about stuff, how I'd been angry with him last week. But I wasn't sure if it was worth talking about.

He said to go ahead. I explained the Imago exercise with T, where I answered questions, and he wrote responses on paper. And how seeing them written on paper had a strong emotional impact on me. But that I realized I only was talking about a couple of the words that affected me with him (T). How one of the words I wasn't talking about was "Loved," because of what had happened with MC in December. How it made me scared to use that word around T. How I was angry at MC for that, how it was messing with my relationship with T.

I said how a certain phrase had gone through my head related to MC, but I was reluctant to say it. H said go ahead with it. After a pause, I said it almost felt like MC had retraumatized me with the stuff in December. How maybe that seemed harsh, but that's what was in my head.

MC said he was sorry I felt like that. I said thanks. He said how in telling him this now, in this way, I was "responding," rather than "reacting," which is a sign of growth. I said, "OK, uh, thanks." And how my sharing the anger with him in this way was a sign of growth. I was like, "OK."

He asked if I wanted to talk about the content, since that was more about the process. I said I thought we were almost out of time. He said we had at least 5 minutes left (perfect for tackling a major issue!) I said I thought I wanted to talk about it but wasn't sure if there was a point. He asked if I felt it wasn't resolved. Or was it that it was resolved, but I was still angry, because that could be OK too. I said I had thought it was resolved, but then when I realized it was affecting another relationship (with T), it made me upset again. Which made me think it wasn't really resolved.

He asked H how he felt about it. H said, "You totally lost me." MC confirmed that H didn't have any comments, and H said he didn't.

I don't feel like much else of substance was said about that. Or maybe I blocked it out? I said I figured we had to determine the next session. H said 2 weeks, MC looked at schedule, said he had conflict, so we scheduled for the Wed. after that. Shook hands, I think he said usual "Good to see you." I didn't feel much of anything as I left and hadn't during the session. Like a little weepy at times, but...

Thinking I'm ready to terminate...maybe next session?