Quote:
Originally Posted by mote.of.soul
Hi. I'm only speculating but I wonder if your past hurts[?] are now coming to the surface in the form of tears. I went through a number of years being very emotionally vulnerable in that way also, and I could only guess that it was being caused by things that were happening in the present, but also things that had troubled me from my past as well. I think if emotions don't have an outlet then maybe they find other ways to come out.
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I tried to spend time on analyzing like the analysis in your post but, maybe this is just me, it just never led anywhere. I guess I'm not sure if it's true that one has to let out ALL the previous negative stuff to get relief and be able to move on in life, I have yet to see concrete proof of this in my own life (because it just keeps coming out and not getting better!), but assuming it's actually true, I would think analyzing too much would just get in the way of releasing the emotions. At least that's the case for me.
Really though, I'm pretty much just confused right now as to whether I should ever have tried to analyze my feelings. Inside and outside therapy. It didn't make me see anything more clearly. The only thing that has ever worked was getting fed up with the negative feelings, noticing how they were no longer leading anywhere, and find the strength that way to get rid of them and try to live life instead further. The problem is that this then created extra anger for me. I guess I will have to learn to let go of that too. Some day I hope I'll get there.
I mean, I just will never be able to be good with people (which is the main source of my problems) and people will never be fully accommodating of that or of my issues resulting from bad experiences from not being good with people, so obviously all I can do is let go of all that and just go back to not wanting too much from people and stay realistic and find what I used to enjoy and enjoy those things again, even on my own without other people. I dunno yet, it's kind of hard to regain equilibrium here.
My point really is, I don't get how all this analysing helps??? It seems to just conserve negative feelings???
What I want is, not conserve any of it, let go as soon as possible, and move on. Restore dysregulated emotionality back to normal, essentially. And I'm posting all this here because I feel like OP has some dysregulated emotionality too and I know first hand how difficult that can get... and I think OP just wants to let go of all of it too.