Snow again. Now I'm worried I won't be able to make it to see substitute T tomorrow. Or maybe I'm worried I will be able to make it. I don't know. I don't know I don't know I don't know. It's only week now til you're back. I'm scared that you're angry with me for needing you too much. I'm just so afraid...it's a whole body feeling and there is no escape from it and every time I think it's eased off it's back even stronger. I wish I could be curled up on your sofa under a blanket and just sleep for a bit in a safe place.