Seesaw, apologies for not particularly helpful reply I'm not doing too well at the moment but wanted to add "I hear you" to this.

I am no where near as accomplished as you but I built a lot of my recovery from a bad depression around certain structure, a chunk being exercise and was a pretty hard task master on myself.

In my case I think a bit of this 'driven thing was part of my identity like Wolfgaze says. Also, and this may or may not be true of you, I was afraid to let anything drop because if that happened I feared the chasm of depression would open up again. With me it was fear governing a lot of my schedule.

I would say you are doing a lot, and maybe you want to build some slack in. Maybe schedule free time in which may or may not mean a bike or hike but could equally mean a nap if you need it.

I am seriously in awe of how you do it all, I work pt and still get crashing fatigue from just a bit of overtime, my stamina is not great and my physical fitness not as it was either. You do great, and I think a bit of slack and you'll still do great, and most importantly avoid burn out.

Sometimes less is more if you know what I mean.