Hospice care can also be like basic hospital care outside an hospital. E.g. maybe he'd be able to get those IV antibiotics at home, with a nurse coming to change the bag every few hours - and someone on call if needed earlier (if the IV catheter dislodges or whatever). Same for nasal cannulas, and those things that suck the mucus out his airway.

I do understand you don't want a nurse to decide whether you bring your boyfriend to the ER! Is that really the rules, that you need their freaking permission?