Quote:
Originally Posted by prefabsprout
No you do not sound like a total prat who is full of herself. You sound like someone struggling with her self esteem who is possibly in a controlling relationship. He seems to want to have a lot of say in what you do or don't do in your life. Only you can decide what you do or don't do.
You write you are losing your sense of reality, this is a big warning sign something is not right. Would you consider a short break away from him, maybe with your parents where you can reflect on things and regain your sense of reality?
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Thank you so much!
The way he puts it anything I "hide" from him is pushing him out, just making decisions all by myself.
Money is a touchy topic since he grew up being poor... and grew up trying not show off that money never was an issue for me...
I know I am stressing out about not finding a job quickly... being unhappy about it...
He has always told me how he dislikes the thought of long distance relationships, because to him it looked as if there was something more important than the partner... (His only other serious relationship ended because of this issue... she was thinking about moving to study although the subject was taught in the same town)
But he encouraged me to look in other towns for jobs I might really like... suggesting that soon he will reach a point in his master thesis where will be more flexible... and that he would rather see me less but more happy.
So I would like to stress that he is trying to support me.
I just assumed he knew about my financial situation...
He really is the kind of person that wants a 100% committed relationship. Us against the world. To him it is like I am choosing unqualified work over spending time with him. I get it. But I just keep doing these mistakes... and when I start to feel like a person behaving repeatedly wrong and egoistic... that is when I feel like I am loosing my sense of reality. But actually... I think he is right. There is no need to stress like this... his family had the impression I need the money really badly, since I am cleaning. Actually, it feels like he is making me see sense... seeing that I was all along at together same time ignoring my financial situation and using it ...
So I don't know. I don't feel like leaving. I guess now he will take a turn to draw back...