I've decided after a few years of being on geodon/Ziprasidone to drop it from my meds regimen. I'm doing so with the approval of my pdoc.

Reasons for quitting:

- General sense of anhedonia
- Feeling numb, unable to experience joy or happiness
- Feeling like my mind had been blunted
- Memory issues
- I was building up a tolerance
- Extreme fatigue an hour after each dose (not ideal as a parent to a busy toddler).

I'm going to document the withdrawal/recovery process here for future reference, if someone else has decided to stop taking geodon.

I wasn't on a very high dose; 40mg a day. 20mg in the morning and 20mg in the afternoon. I started off taking my afternoon dose at 5pm. But gradually the time between doses got shorter and shorter. As of last week by 1pm I would start experiencing withdrawal symptoms.

So I was faced with a choice: up my dose or drop it completely. I chose the latter.

My experience so far:

I've dropped to 20mg per day as of 3 days ago. Holy hell it's been a rough ride. I've experienced all of the withdrawal symptoms which I'll list below. It hasn't been disabling as I'm still able to function at work and home. But it hasn't been pleasant.

Symptoms so far:

- Confusion. A constant feeling of brain fog.
- Dizziness.
- Unable to moderate body temp. I'm either too hot or too cold.
- Sweating. I suffer from hyperhidrosis but this is more than normal.
- Jaw clenching.
- A tightness at the base of my skull that I guess could be described as a constant dull headache.
- Tremors in my hands.
- Inability to speak properly/stuttering. Caused by a combination of jaw clenching and brain fog.
- Heart palpitations.
- Tingling sensation all over my body.
- Inability to concentrate.

And that's just the physical stuff. The emotional/mood stuff only kicked in 2 days into the process. I feel like crying all the time. I feel sad and hopeless. Nihilism is at an all-time high. Fighting off thoughts of suicide. Extreme anxiety. It's as if the floodgates to all the sad, depressing thoughts that the medication suppressed for so long have been opened. Feel on the verge of panic attack at most times. I've been quite defensive combative with my wife.

The worst feeling is the experience of isolation. I don't really have anyone to share this with. My wife tries to understand but can't. And I can feel it.

I'll soldier on and document my progress. If anyone else has experience coming off geodon/antipsychotics please feel free to share.