This must be so very difficult. I am sorry for all you have been through and still go through.

I think you are on the right track with setting some boundaries and demanding some respect.

You may always be triggered, at least to some extent, by some of her behaviors.

I think you'll need to discern when seeing her might set you back and keep yourself safe. Maybe protect yourself as you would if you were the parent protecting you as a little girl. Parent/protect yourself in this way.

Have you dealt with this in therapy?

I wish you healing.

WC