Sorry, this first part has nothing to do with the original post, but how do you quote things previous posters say when responding to a thread?

I agree. Normal is overrated.

BPD is hard, but it is not you. It may have shaped you, but you are not BPD, a series of definitions in a diagnostic manual. I never had this issue with BP, but I had an eating disorder (anorexia) in college. Eventually, it came down to me asking myself, "What do I want to be remembered for?" Do I want to be remembered as a good wife, good mother, good child, good sister, good aunt, good niece, or would I rather be the family member everyone avoids because she has an eating disorder and remote body language? I let the eating disorder define me, and I was lost and floundering once I let go of that definition, trying to figure out just who I was (but I did, eventually!)

BPD is a difficult illness. You can't escape it (not that I even 100% escaped the eating disorder though I am recovered from it), but you shouldn't let it hinder you or consume you. You need to start equating yourself with those positive traits of yours, your particular talents, what makes you stand out, your interests and hobbies. You need to become more well-rounded and obsess less. Hard, I know, but doable.