My T is very boundaried. She is very consistent and yet not rigid. Eg I have out of session contact which we discussed a lot about.

She's boundaried in that she never loosens a boundary unless it's something she can sustain really long term. So whatever she offers, she is absolutely sure she can sustainable maintain, and won't suddenly tighten boundaries.

There's so many stories of Ts here who suddenly tighten boundaries.

Rigid is not a good thing, I feel. It's the opposite of flexible, IMO. Different people need different things.

Feel almost like your T's pride in his rigidity re enacts you receiving no support after traumatic events. Like you're running into a blank, unyielding brick wall of a T, SE.