Hugs if you want them. I hear you. It's like he's more focused in maintaining "professional" distance than being present and human WITH you.

That distancing thing could be counter transference of some form, like how people around distance themselves from people who've experienced trauma. I'll see if I can dig up a research PDF I found on it. It studied various transference and countertransference reactions that commonly come up in the treatment of clients with trauma.

We don't need an uncaring witness - it's reminiscent of the trauma of being unsupported....actually retraumatising. We need someone, such as the therapist, to come alongside us. We need what the literature calls a compassionate witness. It doesn't have to be from a T but we need it from others because the traumas were done within relationships.

And the research talks about how we need more direct expressions of "being with" due to the experiences of trauma and being unsupported after it, not silence and distant doctor-patient "medical" responses.