yeah..
i mean i guess part of me just thinks to isolate and cut everyone off so they cant hurt me by doing it to me in the end

but i want companions and friends and stuff..

im constantly trying to watch.. but im not seeing really
im not sure what it is... and i just want it to stop ruining my life is all..
its just so confusing, i dont know what to think about it, about me, anymore?

there is a war inside of me apparently..

but im trying hard to manage and make everything right, make a life, heal, find peace and happiness

but this part just wont let go... i've turned this whole life upside down, changed everything and am making things happen, but the self fulfilling prophecy trying to live inside me?

i dont know who i am supposed to be any more lol..
im so weird.. gee

i feel like legion, damn demons permeating my reality... lol :/
sigh, im ok though.. just not sure whats happening