see thats why I get confused... I did so many sexual thing as a kid and have been "obsessed" with sex since i was like 12 but never had actual sex or any sexual abuse that i know of and I look up stuff and it says its normal in many cases

I didn't draw on the dolls but I always wanted my barbies to have sex. i got angry my ken doll had underwear on him i couldn't remove. with the other boys my age, one was a cousin we showed each other our privates in a tree house and the other was a boy who was a family friend, kind of the same thing, only i remember he never actually showed me his, he had me go first and laughed and i was mad because he ran away and never did his part of the "Deal"

i also was obsessed with sex on tv... like... to the point for a while that was literally all i wanted to see what sex scenes on shows or i lost interest. lots of things like that i do remember as a kid... but I've blocked out vast majority of my childhood.