I talked to my therapist on the phone today. It was really helpful. She said that even though I don't feel empowered, I am doing empowering things. And we are going to talk about it when I see her tomorrow. She said she doesn't think it has to be either or (leave or stay) and she thinks it wouldn't serve me to go back to my parents house (it would serve me to stay, and to find a way to manage this and the way I feel when I am triggered). I trust her and when she said this, I didn't feel resistance. I'd thought it myself. I think the main thing, is that for some weird reason, this whole thing reminded me of an experience I had about 5 years ago. I am going to talk about that with her too.

((((((((((Cepheid)))))))))) Thank you for your thoughts and support. It might be feasible to live on my own. I'm not sure. I may figure out the logistics later. I don't really have energy right now ...and yeah, I can crash at my parents house on a bad night for sure. They're pretty great like that My mom likes to have notice, I understand that though.

You are quite right that I often feel better the next day, later on, etc. I appreciate you reminding me. I also like your idea of going for a walk and talking to a friend. Last night, I called a helpline. Today, I exercised some. I think posting out my thoughts here, is also helpful.