How you feel is completely understandable to me. You’ve got the biological clock ticking into overtime. You are also dealing with disorders.

If it gives you any solace, I did get married and have kids and the white picket fence. It was no bed of roses! (The marriage and home part. The kids are great.)

There’s no way to know if any other path you may have taken would have been any better for you. You can only keep moving forward.

We all have value. We all have something to give and contribute to the world. That is how our worth is measured— by what we GIVE.

You mentioned a bf who hit you and you blame yourself. No, no, no, I’m pretty sure a man who hits any women is an abuser across the board and will hit other women, too. No woman deserves to be hit. A truly good, non abusive man will never hit any woman.