IMO, your feelings are real and legitimate. When we really like someone (whether a friend and especially in romantic relationships), we are putting ourselves out there and taking a real risk. It sounds like you really like her but want a relationship that is not long distance. Do you think this is why you are all over the place?

If this relationship is uplifting, why stop if she also feels the same way? Since the distance bothers you (?) make no commitments to her--you are right, how can she ever become more than a friend if you do not even live in the same country? You says she wants to meet. Since you really like her, why not? Just be realistic about what is possible with her given the distance. Since you have no other special person in your life--Why not meet and enjoy the moment with no expections about the future. In college, I dated someone who I knew I would never "be with" long term yet thoroughly enjoyed our time together. It hurt when he moved but I would do it all again except for not neglecting my studies. Be careful about texting and skyping so much that you are neglecting other things in your life. Enjoy your time with her but decide how much time you should really be spending on your relationship with her. Maintain balance and perspective (it is not easy to do sometimes. )