I will try not to make this too long, but I need some advice on how to handle a very serious problem in my life. Here is a short background leading to the problem. I am a 38 year old gay man, after denying this all my life, came out 2 years ago. This ended my marriage and threw me into a deep depression, which led to drug and alcohol abuse. I was taken in by my best friend, his sister and another good friend. We lived together for 2 years and they helped me through the toughest time of my life. They became friends that I would give my life up for. My depression led to a suicide attempt this past summer. These people abandonded me after this. Thank God, my exwife and best friend found it in her heart to care for me afterwards. I moved out of the house I was living with these friends in , and moved out on my own. After a stupid argument with one of these friends, he said he never wanted to hear from me again. I still do not know why they all abandoned me. They would never give me the opportunity to ask them what they were feeling. Now, I have returned to work and I work with one of these folks. I go through every day, watching him ignore me, go out of the way to avoid me, etc. He has not said a word to me in 3 months. I know I should just say goodbye, but the loss of the friendships hurts me so much. Especially since I am from out of state and do not have many other good friends here. I feel I can never approach him because he will say to me " I told you I never wanted to hear from you again" I wish I could get over this, but I can not, and it is causing me to slip again. I want them to know how much they have hurt me. I want to know why they abandoned me when I needed them the most. What can I do? How can I get past thinking about them every day?