I remember when I was around 13 that I suddenly felt like part of me had suddenly died. I didn't know what depression was. As a child I remember having lots of fears and obsessions which I quickly skipped or laughted away. BUT I was always yearning to drink alcohol even as young as 5 I would sneak my parents drinks, I had this need to change the way I felt, but wasn't able to comprehend what I was feeling was depression.