Quote:
Originally Posted by Buffy01
Maybe leaving is the best thing. At least you know that you tried your best to save the friendship. It was her lost. If she come back in the future reminder her what she had said and make her be held accountable explain why the friendship ended and explain it was really her fault be resending that email and anything she had sent you that is a reminder that she is at fault. Then explain to her if she want to be in your life she has to make some changes or she can't be in your life. It was very difficult when I end my friendship with my ex best friend when I held her accountable for what her parent had done in person and on the phone to me and how she had treated me. In the end I had to do what felt right for me when I left the friendship there are days I wish I could done something more. I reached out again after it being awhile and realized she hasn't change and never will. I was left feeling really sad.
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Haha, my friend isn't going to change for anyone. Certainly not me!! She is a very rigid. She's a control freak. If I made demands I am sure she would simply not understand. In her mind she is always right. But I already told her in my recent email that I don't tolerate verbal abuse in my life...so I think she might modify her behavior in that regard. She remembers my family of origin which was very emotionally abusive...so she probably knows I won't tolerate her being verbally abusive towards me. Because I won't. That's where I draw the line.
Since my friend did respond to my email today I am willing to not end the friendship or abandon her. Frankly, that is too traumatic for me (I think both of us) right now.
But I am going to hold her at arm's length, as Tish B recommended. I think that is the best strategy.
(I don't save personal emails. I discard them at the end of every day.)