It's not dying that bothers me so much. My parents died early from cancer, and my mom's side of the family has a bunch of relatives who died early from cancer. My dad and his dad both had type 2 diabetes, and I've had that for a while. My weight, blood sugar, and cholesterol are all high due to weight gain and other side effects. Every day that I'm living is a good day.

I think what bothers me more is that my dad's mom is in her nineties with worsening bipolar and Alzheimer's, living in a nursing home. Living that long while losing my mind would concern me.