I am very much alone. I can be around anyone, everyone, and I still feel isolated.

Doesn't matter if I'm sober or not, either. I always feel the exact same.

Maybe I should go IP? I have to either choose that (meaning choosing to believe that this world is real, and I'm more sure right now that it is), or I have to choose to "wake up".

I know I don't want to live, so getting help seems pointless (considering I don't think any amount of meds or therapy can make me want to live).

.....