I asked my T if he was a touchy guy IRL - did he hold hands and hug, etc. We'd had kind of a tough talk about touch - he does not hug his patients, he said he decided for himself that this was best a long time ago. And I, at that point, wanted to hug him. He hesitated and said, "I don't want to upset you -- by not answering you'll reach a conclusion and by answering, I'm afraid you'll take it personal. " And then he said that yes, he liked to hold hands and he did give greeting hugs, etc. I sort of had guessed that about him, it fits his personality. But he worked hard to make it clear that this had nothing to do with me, it was his policy for all his patients.

I understood - but it hurt, still does sometimes. There is just so much longing for physical connection sometimes. Totally not about sex - it is about soothing. *sigh*