(((((hugs))))))))

Eskie, I know being in the hospital at this time makes the actual phoning and information process of the arrangements tougher, but maybe God put you there so you wouldn't be alone during this process?

You mother's passing is so common among a loving family: they wait till we tell them they don't have to hang on for us...

I can't fully imagine how it must be to be an only child. If it's any consolation, you at least don't have the conflicts that often occur between family members with planning and such. It isn't always love and comfort.

Soon you will realize, I think, that NOW you have your mother to talk to all the time, and she will guide you on your way much better than she did while lying in her sick bed. Her presence, her words, they will be so real for you, I pray.

Now, for you! I know you are having difficulty eating anything, but please be sure to not eat peanuts, spinach, nor black or orange pekoe tea. Those food items bind enzymatically with any iron in your system and throw it out! My own MD had to learn this from me, as my oncologist/hemotologist educated me! I hope you can begin to eat, as your mother would also wish you to become healthy again.. you know... and you can honor her this way too.

God bless you in your struggles.