I hate those anniversary remembrances that seem to sneak up on you without one willing them. I spent nearly all nine years with my T, 1996-2005 with her going away each Christmas and having a hard time independent of that for some reason. It just didn't help that she was away but didn't feel like she was the cause. I finally realized it probably had to do with the last Christmas I spent with my mother before she died, Christmas 1953! What a heck of a thing to have buried for 50 years and to have to spend so many years working to resolve.

I'm glad you gave your daughter a rest. I wish you could have had a rest before your parents died. It's so hard to do all the work with the hurts, like Snowflake says. I'm sure all of us would love to help any way you can think to ask us to.